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Hymns for the Hardened Heart

by Brent Loveday

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1.
Take a Ride 03:16
Take a Ride There’s a powder blue 1960 Cadillac Deville. It cruises up and down these alleyways of Capitol Hill. There’s a red headed heartbreaker behind the steering wheel. She ain’t found the one she’s looking for, She probably never will. But she creeps like a rattlesnake, crawling through the bush. She passes by my door, she gives my horn a push. I know what time it is without looking at my clock. I’m out to rendezvous as she’s coming ‘round the block. I’d like to take a ride with you... Let me take a ride with you. She takes off like a bottle rocket when she shoves it into drive. A few seconds later, we’re doing 65. There ain’t so signs of slowing once her motor gets to going, She’s in the driver’s seat with her garter belt a’showing. Playing with her hair, sucking on a lollipop. Telling me to “put it there. Oh, baby, don’t you stop.” Go on with your bad self, and do that thing you do. And when you drop me off, it’s back to singing the blues. I’d like to take a ride with you... Let me take a ride with you.
2.
Ballad of Johnny Black June June gunned down Johnny Black. Shot him in the back over a 1/4oz. sack. A hot summer night hosted that heinous attack. June June, Johnny raised you from a little whipper snap. He bounced you as a baby on his long-legged lap. You’re a Judas and a Brutus, dancing on a gallow’s trap. Well, June June went down to Miami PD. That’s where he told those homo-cides, “it sure wasn’t me. I was sleeping in my bed by 12:30... And before that I had spent all night watching TV. And for Johnny Black, I would’ve parted the sea. You’ve got no motive or a weapon, so go on and set me free.” But that detective knew something June June didn’t know. He left the room and came back with his ace in the hole. He said, “that weed you fronted Johnny is a debt you now owe. And the dealer you’ve been pushing for has already rolled. You can sort it out while you wait on Death Row. Let the record show you killed Johnny Black and not John Doe.”
3.
“Shut Up and Drive” Oh, Lord, turn down the radio. For once, be a god who’s kind and just. There’s something in that melody, it gets my tears a’falling. Starts a long lost memory covered in rust. Oh, Lord, don’t turn down that avenue. What sinister trap hath thee laid for me? Ghost peer from parlor windows and they whisper awful curses Behind silk curtains like archenemies. This road we’re on is paved with good intentions. But if I were you there’s quite a few things I wouldn’t mention. Let me cry these tears I’ve earned. It’s a little late to act concerned. Like sleeping dogs and dusty urns, Not every stone needs to be turned. Oh, Lord, don’t you remind me, When I’m the one who lives with it everyday. If my memory serves me well, there was just one set of footprints, With the other pair clearly running away.
4.
Rene Delray 04:44
“Rene Delray” Rene Delray’s daddy keeps her cooped up in a cat house down off Central Street. I saw her one night. She was walking in her garden and floating on her bare feet. I said, “sweet Rene, how come your daddy say not to talk to you?” Well, I don’t care none. I think it’d be fun just to walk with you, Rene, if you want me to.” Her pale cheeks turned red when by her hand I led her into me for our first kiss. By the light of the moon, I could see I was doomed... Desmond Delray promised me Hell to pay and he meant it He said, “go ‘head and run, when the bullet finally comes, You’ll know that I’m the one who sent it.” Mr. Delray, don’t you know that you’ll hold something tightest with an open hand? And the tiniest spark will turn a sliver of bark into a burning flame The first chance it can? If you lie awake and wait for the Earth to quake you won’t never get any rest. Can you feel that your hat is one feather less? Desmond Delray’s jealous was only matched by his pride. With the prowess of a pimp, up my porch steps he limped, With a pistol dangling by his side. Rene said, “please Daddy, go home. I’m not your little girl anymore.” And with the crack of a whip and a curse from his lips, He sent justice raining through my door. If you lie awake and wait for the Earth to quake you won’t never get any rest. By the light of the moon, my dream ended too soon. Rene Delray’s daddy keeps her cooped in a coffin down off Central Street.
5.
Broadway 03:32
“Broadway” You wanted to leave on Broadway. So I bought you a penthouse one block away. But girl, you ain’t never been satisfied. Brand new Cadillac... you can’t enjoy the ride. You’re a petulant child who’s grown bored with a gift. You’re eyes start to roam and your legs start to shift. So possessed by hunger that you won’t even lift your head To see by who’s hand your getting fed. If you want it, then you got it, Because I gave it to you. One of everything But that wouldn’t do. Now I got nothing, Want me to split it with you?
6.
“A Wicked Life” It was a wicked life that led me to the Lord It was a wicked life that led me to the Lord It was a life of crime and shame, But I broke its binds and chains. It was a wicked life that led me to the Lord It was sin that saved my poor soul Yes, it was sin that saved my poor soul The Lord heard my lonesome cry, And he did not pass me by. It was sin that saved my poor soul. No preacher led me to the gate No preacher led me to the gate When I thought all was lost, It was Christ who paid the cost... No preacher led me to the gate No preacher led me to the gate.
7.
“The Cemetery Song” Let’s move into that house next to the cemetery, With the two broken windows and the big cypress tree. We’ll listen to the ghost dance until dawn, Around pink flamingos that we put on the lawn. Let’s hang a horseshoe over the front door. Every night I’ll pray that my sins are paid for. That’d be something to see, you and me, next to the cemetery. Well, I’ll hold you real tight if you really get scared. Tell you it’s the wind or a mouse under the stairs. Something ‘bout this place puts me under a spell. If you play along, I promise not to tell. Through thick and thin, good and bad, right or wrong, Ain’t no wind so strong as to blow down this home. We’ll be so happy, that’s you and me, next to the cemetery. Loving someone is so frightening, Like voices in the night. So bring on the thunder and lightning, It can only ease the fright. You never know it just might... Let’s move into that house next to the cemetery, With the two broken windows and the big cypress tree. We’ll listen to the ghost dance until dawn, Around pink flamingos that we put on the lawn. Every haunted castle needs a King and Queen. Every night we’ll pretend it’s just like Halloween. We could be so happy, that’s you and me... Next to the cemetery... We’ll be so happy, you and me, next to the cemetery.
8.
“Light a Candle” I light a candle for you. I’ve lit more than a few. I used to watch them burn, Until the day you returned. Now let’s talk about all the lessons you learned. Like how cold the world is, How you were never his. I light a candle for you. Do you believe in ghost? Let me propose a toast. Here’s to a love that’s dead. At least that’s what you said. But you don’t look thirsty with this gun to your head. Wine as red as bloodstains, Me and you and this flame. I light a candle for you. We’re Even Steven, cross my heart, I hope to die, we’ll never part again. No, no, no... You took a piece of me when we was through, But now I’ve taken all of you. Like a bitter pill, I swallowed you. I made sure no one followed you. The next time that I hear you scream, Is gonna be in my dreams. I’ll light a candle for you. I light a candle for you. That’s all that’s left to do. It’s such a sight to behold, Now that your story’s told. And just like your lips, someday your case will go cold. Say you were never his. Tell me how tight that rope is... I’ll light a candle for you.
9.
“The County’s Ward” There’s no pictures on the wall at the county’s ward in this hospital bed where I’m laying. And the chaplains, they don’t bother to come here no more. Lord knows it’s too late for praying when you’re here. You might have a day, son You might have a year. It’s too late for praying when you’re here. There’s no back door to the county’s ward To slip through when Death, he comes calling. There’s just one corridor that leads to this floor. One fatal trip sends you falling down. No angels will catch you as you seep through the ground. One fatal trip sends you down. No pills are took, And no doctors take looks, At the chart on the hook, Hanging from your bed’s foot. There’s no windows on the wall of the county’s ward It’s whitewash from floor to the ceiling. And no shadows are cast, and there’s always a draft. In these halls you won’t find no healing when you’re here. Your days slip away faster than a dog’s years. It’s too late for praying when you’re here. Yeah, it’s too late for praying when you’re lying here.
10.
“Beyond the Grave” I’ve kissed you many times from the grave. Every time a warm summer wind blew. Every sunset glowing with that gold familiar hue, Was a reminder that I’d come back for you. So many times you’ve cried over my bones, And left flowers to die on my tombstone. But, my love, what led you to believe you were alone? I left reminders that I’d come back for you. So, my love, wipe you your tears away. For it’s not in this cold ground where I lay. Take this razor to your wrist. You’re only steps away... I left reminders that I’d come back for you. A stranger’s grin, you’re crawling skin, All of these were clues. Reminders that I’d come back for you.

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released October 7, 2018

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Brent Loveday Denver, Colorado

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